Brett Fish, Author at 1Africa

Othering: Getting to know the ‘Other’

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October 17, 2016

Blessed are the ‘Others’.

Have you ever been in a conversation when suddenly someone whips out the phrase ‘those people’ and it suddenly feels like a huge wall has just been built?

It’s happening in South African Universities right now.

‘Those people’

‘Those students’

‘Those animals/thugs/hooligans’ and perhaps some even less favourable terms.

Once someone has been “othered”, it is a lot easier to be on the side that is eager to “release the hounds!” or whatever sense of justice or punishment we think they deserve. Because they are “other”, they are different. They are not us.

PLEASE DON’T SHOOT MY DAUGHTER

I had breakfast with someone this morning who told me a story of two of his mutual friends.

One of his friends (who in his past had been an activist and fought similar struggles) made a statement about how the police should be allowed live ammunition and should go in and shoot… “those people.”

His second friend jumped in and shared that his daughter was one of the people marching. “Please don’t encourage the police to shoot my daughter!”.

OTHERING VS INVITING

We have seen this play out on the international stage with the refugee crisis across Europe. It is a lot easier to keep “those people” or “foreigners” or “those muslims” or “possible terrorists” outside of our borders, than when they become families with names and faces and stories.

It has been the messed up narrative of South Africa where artificial constructs, such as race, have been used to differentiate between “us and them”. And while they remain a “them” it is far easier to deal with them at a distance and with more suspicion, dehumanisation and violence than if they were an “us”.

Jesus springs to mind. Whatever your thoughts or feelings about who He was, if you follow the stories, He was never someone who “othered” people. We see stories of people trying to “other” those around Him to “protect Jesus” or something.

Yet every time, He seems to call them closer. Women, children, a man with leprosy, a Samaritan woman at the well, even a Pharisee in the middle of the night (the one person we would be okay with Jesus “othering”). “Bring them closer. Let them come to me!”

You see Jesus saw in every person the spark of divinity, the image of the creator that they had been created with.

BREAK DOWN THE WALLS

I have found that the best way to break down these othering walls is to engage with people different to us and listen to their stories. This doesn’t mean I end up agreeing with everyone I sit down with, but it means I will give myself a better chance to see their humanity. To maybe understand their path a little more and recognise how they ended up at this point.

One thing my wife and I have tried to do is host dinners which we call Deep Dive Conversation Dinners (but which really don’t need an official name) with the idea of bringing people with differing viewpoints together. You get into an online fight with me on social media? Hey, come sit across the table from me and share a coffee or a meal. Imagine if we could all do this more consistently.

At one point while I was part of the peacekeeping team at CPUT Bellville last week, some students started playing soccer. A bunch of us thought how amazing it would be if some of the police or private security dropped their armour and weapons for a few minutes and joined in. How would experiencing a moment of shared humanity impact on the bigger picture of violence, mistrust and negotiations?

How do we break down the othering? One thing South Africa needs most now is creative people who will think outside of the box in terms of bringing people together. In terms of being able to tear down the walls of othering and help us all realise that we can build this thing together somehow.

While we wait for that, who is someone that you tend to ‘other’ that you could reach out to and share a space with this week?

Peace and Justice Witnesses

Lifestyle

Brett Fish

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October 10, 2016

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Blessed are those who stand for peace.

This week I was hoping to write some more of the book that I am busy with, about white people and race engagement. I was also hoping to film the next clip for my video series called ‘Race with me’ on YouTube. Neither of them happened.

I recently wrote a piece on Anticipating the Interruption which was all about living life with a readiness to drop what you’re doing if the right kind of interruption comes along. So following my own advice, this week, instead of talking about justice issues, I had the opportunity to postpone those and be a presence on some of our university campuses.

PJW

I was invited to attend a training Monday morning on mediating. Within a few hours of this, a team of us were heading up to the University of Cape Town (UCT) to try to be a peaceful presence in the midst of growing protest.

I had an opportunity at the end of last year to go to the University of the Western Cape (UWC) at quite a volatile time, to be part of a group of Christian pastors who were there also to try help things remain calm. I jumped at the chance, albeit with some sense of anxiety of not knowing what could happen.

At the end of a long and tiring week (hot sun, a lot of walking, not the greatest eating schedule, praying and trying to figure out what to do as different situations arose), I look back with gratitude.

A team ranging from students to pensioners, men and women, different race groups and backgrounds, all united with a common cause. To observe and hopefully de-escalate any situations that appeared to be getting out of control.

ALL IN ALL A GREAT WEEK

If there is one thing I would love to see everyone in South Africa take away from the situations at the University, it’s the idea that it is not simple. It is a completely complex and complicated situation with so many factors and so many different parties represented or involved. To dismiss the movement completely without taking any time to engage with students and lecturers feels like a fool’s errand. To think that every single aspect and event that is part of the struggle is legitimate is probably just the same.

So our chief aim was to observe. To listen and be impartial and hopefully be a presence that calmed and helped lead people to negotiation and conversation rather than clash and incident.

And although there still were some volatile moments at two of the campuses we were present on, we definitely saw a lot of benefit. A group of passionate, brave, loving, gentle but firm volunteers gave of their energy and time [above and beyond] for a cause that in one way was not even their own. But in another way totally is all of ours.

This feels like one of the most significant times in the life of our nation. We don’t know which way things will go. But I for one am glad that in Cape Town we are seeing the church get involved in the most positive of ways. Let’s hope it continues. But let us all continue to engage with the struggle and keep the humanity of the people on all sides of this in mind. For a better stronger South Africa.

Protest and the “Miss” of Dismissing

Brett Fish

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October 6, 2016

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South African Universities are in a bit of a crisis at the moment. But exactly how deep the crisis is, might depend on where you get your information from.

Yesterday I was fortunate to be part of a small group of people from a number of different churches who went to the University of Cape Town as a Peace Witness team. Our role was simply to observe what was going on and to be a presence that would hopefully be a calming influence to what is a volatile and tense situation.

One thing that I was reminded of as we were leaving, was that the story we experienced was very different to the story the media was telling.

Read about current University protests in a newspaper or watch a tv news bulletin and you get a story.

Spend some time on one of the trending hashtags such as #UCTShutdown or #FeesMustFall on Twitter and you will get a completely different story.

Spend some time at the actual University and you may find yourself a little closer to the real story

Take time to engage

It is disappointing to see a number of people – and if we’re completely honest, they tend to be white people – respond to things like the student protests by dismissing them.

When faeces are being thrown at statues. When paintings are being ripped off the walls and burned or when other acts of destruction and violence become part of the protest, it can be a lot easier to dismiss rather than to engage. The problem with that is; when being dismissive is your starting point, there is a strong possibility that you will be missing something.

As with many things in life, I believe it is possible to not condone some of the destructive acts that have happened on the campuses, while at the same time engaging with the people involved and trying to understand what got them to the point of destruction.

I found this article by Jane Duncan, entitled “Why student protests in South Africa have turned violent’ , to be very helpful and informative in terms of understanding some of the possible journey towards that type of protest:

The sad reality is that the authorities often ignore peaceful, non-disruptive protests. Outside the university context, civic organisations like Abahlali base Mjondolo have engaged in road blockades because their more conventional protests were ignored.

Ask before declaring

As I mentioned, what was most helpful to me, was being able to go to the local university and spend some time with students. To listen to their speeches, watching their behaviour and observing the way that the university, local police and hired private security behaved made all the difference.

While not everyone can physically go to the universities, I encourage you to speak to some students (not just the ones who look like you and might think like you) and follow the Twitter feed (which tends to give a more balanced overview as different voices are compiling it, plus you get photos and videos too) so that you can try to get a more accurate view of what is happening.

I think another key factor in this whole conversation is dissecting our understandings of what constitutes ‘violence’ – we see a painting burning and call that ‘violence’ but a young person unable to finish his studies because of exorbitant fees is not. My friend Ashley Visagie expressed it really well:

“I think violence has been oversimplified in this discussion. Perhaps it is useful to step back and ask what exactly constitutes violence? Is it burning a building? Is it putting faeces in Cecil John Rhodes’ face (at least a sculpture of his face)? Or is inequality a form of violence exerted upon the poor by the rich who strive to uphold the the system of injustices that keep them in power?

How do we reconcile the existence of billionaires in a world where people die of hunger and starvation? Is that not violence? How do we justify the fact that some people attend schooling for R200k per annum IN SA when others attend a school where a child has died falling into a pit toilet? Is that not violence? – no student chooses violence as a first option – heck it must take a lot of courage to stand unarmed with no riot protection gear on the frontlines and have a police officer throw a flash bang toward your face…I don’t believe people do that for the heck of it….is that not violence? Denying someone an education and then requiring the same education in the labour market…is that not violence?

Unfortunately we live in a society where those with power and influence don’t WANT to listen and they have enough money to ignore it and enough police and armed response forces to not need to until things get out of control. So when a student says they will make things ungovernable, I guess they’re saying they want to create the conditions necessary for the powerful to actually listen for understanding. Let’s not continue to oversimply violence.”

This is such a significant time in South Africa and how these University disputes are resolved will influence how the nation progresses. We cannot simply dismiss the whole thing because we haven’t taken the time to really try to understand what is going on.

Anticipating the interruption

Brett Fish

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October 3, 2016

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In the last 24 hours I have been faced with two interruptions.

Interruption the first

My wife Valerie was away for the weekend at the dam in Theewaterskloof for some much needed rest and reflection. I got to stay at home for my own version of that, which probably involved a lot more board game playing, cricket watching, connection with people, and snack appreciation.

This afternoon, I was at a friend’s 21st celebration and we’d just heard the speeches when my phone started flashing. Well, actually during the speeches it flashed three times showing an incoming call from Val, but I was trapped in the back corner of the restaurant with speeches happening in front of me so it had to wait till they were done. When I got a moment I went outside and took the call to find that Val had broken down in Grabouw and needed rescuing.

Fortunately my dad has sweet mechanic skills and an old school diesel Merc and so I left the party and we drove through to pick her up and tow her home.

Afternoon plans changed.

Interruption the second

Tomorrow morning UCT is opening its doors to students again.

The Fees Must Fall movement are not so happy about this as it feels completely in opposition to the conversations and changes they are calling for.

Some friends of mine are part of a group of people called Peace Witnesses that are planning to head to the University to look to be people of peace in the midst of what might be quite a volatile situation.

That wasn’t the initial plan I had for tomorrow. Mondays tend to be a busy writing day for me as I have articles, blog posts and a phonetically titled “Thort for the Week” that need to be written. So Mondays tend to be nose-to-the-grindstone focused-work days for me.

But at the same time, this is a particularly significant time in the country and a lot of the university protests have not ended well and so that feels like something I should be present at, especially with all the writing and commenting I’ve been doing on race and poverty vibes in South Africa.

Learning from a pro

In a world of potentially distracting social media, being open to every single opportunity to change your plans in the moment is probably not a wise thing.

But there definitely should be exceptions.

If I had said to Val, “Sorry love, I had actually planned to be at this party and then I was going home to try catch the end of the cricket, please sort yourself out”, that may not have gone down so well.

I am reminded of a story concerning Jesus, who has been asked by a Jewish leader named Jairus to go to his house because his daughter was very sick. On the way there, there is an incident where a woman who had been struggling with sickness for many years reaches out to touch Jesus’ cloak and is immediately healed.

Jesus could have carried on (she was already healed) but instead He chooses to stop and give the woman some attention and use the moment to teach the crowds. As a result, the daughter of Jairus actually dies, but then Jesus performs a miracle and brings her back from the dead.

We actually see this in the life of Jesus often, where He would be heading in one direction and someone would interrupt and He would allow and often actually invite the interruption.

For me it’s about making plans and having schedules, but being open to the important interruptions that may happen along the way. In another popular Jesus story, one He tells of a man beaten up and left for dead (commonly known as The Parable of the Good Samaritan) we are introduced to two religious leaders who don’t make space for the interruption and end up ignoring the man who desperately needs them. Yet the Samaritan interrupts his plans to do something that he now sees as better.

Whose interruption is it anyway?

My invitation to you is to be alert to significant opportunities that may head your way this week in the form of interruptions. Don’t be so stuck to the task at hand or the deadlines in front of you, that you potentially miss something better or more important that may be needing someone like you to step in.

A tip for bad service

Culture

Brett Fish

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September 30, 2016

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Last night a restaurant manager made me feel bad. Which in turn made me feel angry. Yet I was super courteous, paid the bill (which he had removed the offending item off) and left. But I will certainly never go back there again (despite a really amazing burger).

It takes visiting another country (we lived in Americaland for three years) to realise just how bad the service we often get in restaurants here can be. And how we typically accept it, smile and nod, and carry on with our lives.

LAST NIGHT

It was a fairly busy restaurant and we were meeting for a function with a friend and so a good 30 to 40 people so it wasn’t the easiest setup. When I ordered my burger (Val wasn’t hungry so she ordered her drink and deferred her meal for later) the waiter was all over it and kept coming back to check if everything was okay. I straightened myself on my chair at one point and the waiter came running up to see if I wanted something else.

Got my burger and it was amazing and then we put in an order for Val’s meal and a coffee for me (and not even a fancy coffee). And then a black hole opened up and our waiter was sucked into a mysterious vortex and never seen again.

Eventually, close to an hour later he returns with a giant steak that he places in front of her and a few seconds later removes again because it was the wrong person for that meal. I eventually get my very boring, normal, uncomplicated coffee and Val gets her much smaller steak. Which, when she is half way through, turns out to be completely rare on the one side and so I take it back. They eventually return with the small piece of steak we returned cooked properly.

GOOD SERVICE

So when I went to pay, we pretty much had to fight to get the meal taken off the bill and the manager was clearly not convinced that we had been wronged. Not cool, South Africa, and yet why do we put up with it?

There seems to be a culture of being okay with bad service in this country. Maybe part of it is because we are so used to fighting for things in other areas of life that when it comes to a meal or drink we’re just so tired and just aren’t bothered any more.

Although, let’s be honest, this bad service is not limited to the food industry. I could talk for hours about my internet experience and other people will be able to share stories of banks, home affairs, government hospitals, and more.

But surely in the food industry it makes the most sense – where the quality of service given often leads to the money you make from your shift.

ONE THING I DON’T UNDERSTAND

This really is a mystery to me. I worked in a particular family steakhouse restaurant for five years (many years ago) and understood that really quickly. The better my service to everyone, the more likely I am to be tipped well.

While certain waiters would tend to recognise previous customers or hold stereotypes (sadly church people don’t tip was one of those that proved true a little too often) I chose not to. Assume everyone will tip and leave them as happy as absolutely possible and your chance of being tipped is at its maximum.

That doesn’t mean everything always goes right or perfectly and I don’t think that’s what the customer expects. When something goes wrong we just want to be informed truthfully and given expectation as to when and how it will be fixed.

For me it really comes down to this: If you are in a place doing a job then you might as well do it to the best of your ability. If you smile at customers, if you try your best to help them, if you give good service or great damage control, then the likelihood is that you will lift the spirits of the people around you. Which will hopefully make them give you good attitude and possibly a good tip. Which will all round make everyone’s day better.

How about you? Have you had any experiences that suggest that bad service is something we too freely accept? Share a story in the comments.

Movie Review: The Magnificent Seven

Brett Fish

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September 22, 2016

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I won tickets on Twitter to watch The Magnificent Seven tonight so I thought I’d try a unique review.

I decided to try a before-and-after approach where I begin by sharing my expectations and hopes. Later tonight, once I’ve watched the movie, I will share whether those were met or not.

Before

You had me at Chris Pratt. I discovered him playing Andy Dwyer, the irritating boyfriend of Rashida Jones’ character Ann Perkins in the American sitcom Parks and Recreation. He was the most annoying thing about the program and I really didn’t like him. Then, in season two, all of a sudden, it was like they figured him out and he became an absolute fan favourite and I was hooked.

He was launched on to the big screen playing Starlord in the incredible Marvel movie Guardians of the Galaxy and in the same year was a breakout hit as Emmet in The Lego Movie. Bouncing from there into the Jurassic Park reboot, Chris Pratt suddenly had Hollywood at his feet.

Throw Denzel Washington into the mix and a touch of Ethan Hawke in a classic Western remake and what is not to like. Especially when the trailer makes it look like one of the most gritty action-packed movies of the year. With an esteemed director in Antoine Fuqua (Training Day, Olympus has Fallen) it really seems like this is going to be a qualified hit.

Despite being a reboot, the original (which was itself a remake of Akira Kurosawa’s Seven Samurai) released in 1960, and so it doesn’t carry the same kind of concern as a Spiderman or Batman, coming a few years after the previous one. With legends like Yul Brynner, Steve McQueen, Charles Bronon and James Coburn it became immensely popular and this one looks like it will be the same.

Hollywood tends to dabble in the Western genre every couple of years, which means it feels quite fresh when one does come out. So I have huge expectation for what we are going to see later tonight.

After

“If any underdog sporting movie had a baby with any Quentin Tarentino movie” is how my wife, tbV (the beautiful Val) described what we just watched. And she is not far off.

My Twitter response upon walking out of The Magnificent Seven after it had finished was simply: Now that was a western.

Bear in mind that it was directed by Antonie Fuqua and so it’s not a gentle family western. People die, and some quite violently. But on the whole that was everything I look for in a movie in terms of pure entertainment, fun and action.

From the panoramic views to the powerfully western soundtrack to the way in which each and every supporting cast member adds to the overall story, it is obvious that Antonie Fuqua is weaving this tale together with all the resources at his disposal.

Special shout out must go to Peter Sarsgaard who steals a lot of the movie as the villainous Bartholomew Bogue. He is excellent as the evil industrialist who has the town at his mercy before our heroes arrive.

So highly recommended, and a great addition to the modern western genre of western movies such as True Grit and Django Unchained. I’m not convinced it added too much to the original but rather brought a great story to the screen for a new generation.

One of the biggest themes explored in The Magnificent Seven is motivation as each of the fighters has their own reasons for being involved and many of them carry scars both literally and figuratively from the past that helped them become the men they end up being. Boasting a diverse cast and also a lead woman, Emma Cullen who hires the group (played strongly by Haley Bennett) who is not stereotyped but right in the middle of the action, The Magnificent Seven also manages to stay clear of being a typical gang of white guys riding in to save the day.

Do it. Watch it. And let us know what you think. For me, from start to finish, it was a great and entertaining watch.

A simple guide to eating smart

Brett Fish

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September 19, 2016

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How do you do when it comes to food?

Food is one of those weird, crazy, infuriating things and different people have different relationships with it. Some people eat to live while others live to eat. Which one are you?

While I think I tend to be an eat-to-live kind of guy, I do still enjoy food and I also enjoy hanging out in the kitchen experimenting with different types of food. I do use recipes from time to time and try to learn new dishes to add to my repertoire, but more often than not I actually enjoy combining whatever is in the fridge and then usually throwing in a mystery ingredient (spoonful of coffee granules, some honey, some shavings of orange peel) to give it a distinct “me” taste. And miraculously, more often than not these experiments have worked.

EAT SMART

I heard about a bachelor guy who I met recently, who has never cooked a meal for himself ever. And he’s beyond 30. So this guy lives on takeaways, and to be honest the evidence is pretty clear when it comes to his body. This guy needs an intervention.

Now while Steers chips are pretty much to die for when you add Thousand Island sauce, and I enjoy a good KFC Streetwise II on occasion, my wife and I generally tend to steer clear of takeaways – both in terms of health reasons and also price. We also tend not to go to restaurants a lot unless there is some special occasion.

For the most part eating home is where it’s at and it really can seriously affect your budget (in a good way) as well as helping you eat more healthily.

COLLABORATE AND LIST THEN

If you are someone who doesn’t and maybe has never cooked for yourself, or if you find yourself in a rut when it comes to what meals to make, here are some simple ideas to help you out:

Google it: My wife used to struggle to make a good cheese sauce for her cauliflower and broccoli meals. So I decided to give it a try. But I didn’t know where to start. One Google search for “simple cheese white sauce” later and I was set. My sauce rocked and I became designated cheese sauce guy. There are also sites where you can enter in a list of the ingredients you have and it will design a meal for you. But these days you really can do pretty much anything from Google and there are a lot of walk-through videos where you get to see and hear everything as it happens.
Get someone to teach you: If you’ve never cooked anything in your life, then speak to your friends and family and ask them to share a simple dish with you and then just go for it. It’s amazing how easy so many types of food are to make and once you’ve nailed it once, it’s yours for life. Maybe don’t go jumping to Lobster Thermidor with Parmesan and Mushrooms on your first attempt. Bake a potato, throw together a batch of french toast, or attempt your first pasta. And then grow your list from there.
Potluck a recipe book: When my wife tbV (the beautiful Val) and I started doing one week meat free every second week, we were in need of tasty veg recipes. So we threw it out on social media via a blog post and people responded en masse. We now have 20 or so recipes saved with a variety of styles and flavours. So why not email a group of your friends and ask them each to submit one easy or favourite recipe they love making and create a document that you can share with everyone.

Lastly, I would encourage you to experiment: Spices and herbs and new ingredients and new dishes. At one point when we were in Americaland, tbV and I started making one new dish each per month – that is really manageable. Why not try a meal from another country (and if you know someone from that country maybe they will agree to come and show you how it’s done).

Beyond that, probably our biggest tip would be to sit down on Saturday or Sunday before you do your big shop and plan the week’s meals (and if you’re married who is going to cook them, and if you’re a parent why not start creating spaces for your children to help out or even cook their own meal?) When you have a plan in place you are less likely to give in to the simple option of ordering take-out and you will also know exactly what you need and so it will help cut costs when shopping.

Simple, healthy, and with a whole range of possibilities. Eating at home could revolutionise your life.

What is one dish that you have tried to make for the first time this year and how did it go? Tell us about it in the comments.

Overwhelmed? You can’t save all the babies!

Brett Fish

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September 12, 2016

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Overwhelmed? You can’t save all the babies!

It can feel overwhelming to be in the world sometimes, especially of late. So many problems, such huge issues, so much drama on social media – corruption, terrorism, racism, sexism, and the lists go on.

And you can be, but if that happens, then you’re pretty much done.

So what then is the alternative, if there even is one?

Well to put it simply, don’t be overwhelmed. Maybe just go as far as whelmed and then no further.

The only person you can really save is you

If we fall apart, then we are going to not be of much use to anyone else, and so my first suggestion is to look after yourself. There are many things in life we have no control over, but the things we do are where we should begin.

Make sure you are eating well. Look after your sleep times. Find some form of exercise to get busy with. Not only do these help strengthen, refresh, and build you up, but they can also be helpful distractions to all the things that are presently overwhelming you.

Get reading – what issues are you interested in? Find some writers and bloggers or maybe podcasters who are writing about the things you want to see a difference in. Invite different voices to the ones you are used to, including different sources of news than those you regularly follow, so that you can expand your view and vision of the world.

Use the ears you have

Once you have started to get yourself into shape in all of those areas, look around at the people in your circles, in your friendship groups, in your sports team, or at work. Initiate conversations about the things you’ve been learning as well as the areas you want to make a difference in.

They already (hopefully) like you and so are more likely to listen. Share helpful articles and opportunities you see on social media. Maybe invite someone to join you as you do something.

Look out for opportunities

Next up you want to start getting practical. As the title suggests, “You can’t save all the babies,” which is a little tongue in cheek as this isn’t really about saving anyone, but perhaps it is about finding spaces and times to show up and get involved somehow.

I have a friend, Ashley, who heads up an organisation called Bottomup in the Western Cape – among other things they teach children how to play chess and take them to tournaments and pour into their lives. Another set of friends, Duncan and Viv, along with a bunch of other mostly students, head out to a school in Langa every Friday to teach primary school children maths.

Those are just two simple ideas – whether your focus is on education or HIV, on old people or animals, on prisoners or those living on the streets, I can guarantee you it is quite easy to find a group of people making a difference who would love for you to get involved.

Do something

Which brings me right back to the start. Often when we catch sight of everything that needs to happen it can flatten us. But the moment we get involved in one thing that needs to happen and start seeing change there, it inspires us, it gives us stories to help inspire others to get involved; it focuses us on the changes that are possible and it starts to chip away at all the negativity in the world.

So don’t try and do everything. But if you’re doing nothing, then how about you start looking for one thing to put your hand to to get involved with through your time or energy or skills or resources. So many opportunities.

What is one thing you are currently involved in that there might be space for others to get involved with? Share a story with us in the comments section.

Hair today, gone tomorrow

Brett Fish

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September 5, 2016

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So recently the South African Twitter-verse exploded around the hashtag #PretoriaGirlsHigh.

It’s been all over social media and by the time this goes to print, I imagine the conversation will have largely worked its course and so this is not so much about that moment and that instance or that beautiful but school-illegal hair.

It was very frustrating for me, as a white person even, to read so many typical white responses of misdirection/defensiveness and condescension from those who didn’t get it. Although let me disclaim that as a white male I can only “get it” to a certain extent myself. I cannot fully understand the pain, frustration and challenge to identity that this incident brings up for so many.

Beyond the hair

It is also important to realise that this was not an isolated incident, but rather a “this-far-and-no-further” moment after years of incidents as betrayed in this excellent article by matric student, Malaika Eyoh who starts the article with this line:

“In a school where stories of racism and injustice from black girls are usually met with silence from the staff, this time, our silence was met with police and dogs.”

Later on in the article Malaika added:

“Incidents like these occur on a weekly basis at Pretoria High School for Girls. White students lovingly refer to Girls High as ‘the most fair and just’ school that they know. They tell us racism doesn’t exist because they’ve never experienced it. Meanwhile, black girls live in fear and discomfort at existing in their skin in that same environment… the one that they trusted to keep them safe. It’s clearer now more than ever that black and white girls may sit in class together, but we don’t experience the school in the same way.

A call to white people

Local author and radio personality Eusebius McKaiser had some helpful tips for a caller on Cape Talk.

“I’m going to give you three rules of thumb for allies. Rule number 1: you do not know everything about black people and black people’s hair. Rule number 2: always – even if it’s a little hard – bite the tongue and show humility when someone else is talking about their lived experiences.Rule number 3: never ever think you’ve figured it all out about people who are fundamentally different to you.”

You can catch the whole conversation over here.

The Pretoria Girls High School hair incident is a fresh opportunity for white South Africans like myself to put those simple rules into practice. We so desperately need to be listening and learning more than trying to lead these conversations and we need to help other white people to do the same.

What has happened or is happening at this school is but a glimpse of what is taking place and needs to at various other places all around the country. We need to be wrestling with these concepts and trying to figure out where and how we need to get involved.

But in the meantime let’s be proud that there are some impressive young people like Zulaikha Patel and Malaika Maoh Eyoh who are leading the way, quite possibly towards all of our redemption.

Privilege has a choice

Lifestyle

Brett Fish

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September 5, 2016

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Take a moment to consider any privilege you might have.

In South Africa, thoughts naturally go to race and the privilege white people have carried so long simply because of the colour they were born.

But as a man, there is an unwanted, unchosen, unfought for privilege that I carry. I still don’t think I quite understand the extent of this, although listening to some stories my wife told when we lived in Philly of how she was harassed on the way to work (about a five block walk) when I wasn’t with her brought some of it to light. There was also the famous video made of a woman, Shoshana Roberts, walking around New York City for ten hours being secretly filmed and all the catcalls and harassment that was directed at her.

Part of my male privilege is being able to walk around freely and not fear that I will be catcalled, harassed, or followed in a way that makes me feel not safe.

Faith and body

There are certain countries where being a Christian would mean that I would be at risk, but that is not the case in South Africa. While the privilege being a Christian carries is not as strong as it used to be, Christianity is still the predominant religion in the country and much of its structure and law was created with that in mind and so there is still somewhat of a bias towards us. I certainly don’t have to fear that following my religion will bring overt persecution by and large.

Whereas we have seen around the world that being Muslim carries a certain amount of risk of persecution largely from the ways that Islam has been connected to terrorism via the media and various people and organisations.

As someone who is able-bodied, that is another form of privilege that I carry. A person in a wheelchair, for example, has to think twice about attending an event or going to a meeting in a new place, asking questions about whether that place will be wheelchair-friendly. Whereas my able-bodied privilege means that I can go anywhere I want to, confident that I will have access to all of the spaces and opportunities available there.

The choice

Often when we start talking about privilege, particularly when it comes to race I think, people think we want them to feel bad about having it. That is really not the case. When it comes to able-bodied privilege, the solution is not that everyone gets a wheelchair and only starts accessing places wheelchairs can go.

Rather, and this works with any kind of privilege, it is about recognising and acknowledging the privilege and then being aware of how I can use my privilege to better walk alongside and support those who don’t benefit from it.

When it comes to access to buildings, there might be an opportunity for me to help out someone in a wheelchair by going to a building they can’t access in their place. But I should be thinking creatively about how I can help that building to become more wheelchair friendly.

Bringing it back specifically to race, but with the other areas of privilege in mind, the main point I want to make today is about choice. As a white person who is trying to be an ally to people of colour in general, I get to choose when and how to get involved. The temptation can be that I start thinking I am so great because I am trying to make a difference. But the reality is that all I am trying to do is head things towards what should be normal.

People of race who face prejudice and obstacles and continue to come against structural and systemic violence where things have not changed, face those things on a daily basis. And I get to pick and choose. After a couple of particularly rough days where there has been a lot of push-back or someone challenged me or made me feel bad I can choose to take a few days off and then “pick up the fight” when I’m feeling up to it again. What a completely ridiculous notion.

As a person of privilege (in whatever area) I need to be constantly on the lookout for where I can ally and assist and interrupt structures and systems that help me more than those around me.

What is one area of privilege that you recognise you benefit from and one way in which you have been able to use that privilege to assist someone else? Let’s share some stories in the comments.

Brett Fish

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PJW

ALL IN ALL A GREAT WEEK

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