Fran Thring, Author at 1Africa

5 inspiring movies for winter

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April 15, 2016

There is nothing better than a night at the movies. Grab your good-looking other half or a group of girl friends, a bowl of butter popcorn, a gigantic coke, and you’re set for a good night. Especially if the film is good.

Movies are powerful, they immerse us in someone else’s story. They allow us to travel through time, to travel to other destinations, to see things we only see in our imagination and experience things we could never experience in our day-to-day world. A good film is inspiring – you walk out with your mind buzzing with new ideas and possibility.

Here are five inspiring and thought-provoking classics that, as winter creeps a little closer, you may wish to snuggle up to.

The Shawshank Redemption

“Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.” – Andy Dufresne

“Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free.” Hands down one of my favourite movies of all time, this film is based on a novel written by Stephen King. It follows the 19-year-long imprisonment of an innocent man, Andy Dufresne. Throughout the film Andy holds onto an undying hope and shows a remarkable determination to get free. While he is in jail a friendship grows between two men, Andy and Red (Morgan Freeman). I won’t ruin it by telling you what happens but I think it’s sufficient to say it is a powerful and emotional story of redemption.

2. The Passion of the Christ

“You have heard it said you shall love your neighbour and hate your enemy. But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. For if you love only those who love you, what reward is there in that?” – Jesus

Tagline: One man changed the world forever.

This gripping and violent epic shows the last 12 hours of the life of Jesus on earth and the events around the crucifixion. Whether you are Christian or not, none can doubt the effect this man’s life had on our the world. The film brings to life the extreme brutality which Jesus endured because of his claim to be the Son of God. Not something to watch with your kids (due to the violence), but a good film to watch if you have questions about the Christian faith.

3. The Pursuit of Happyness

“If you want something, go get it. Period.” – Chris Gardner

This is a perfect story for the kids. Starring Will Smith and his talented son, Jaden Smith, the film follows the life of a man who finds himself homeless with nowhere to go. The story shows the main character overcome difficulty and fight for his hopes, loves, and dreams. The movie leaves you with the conviction that you can realise your dreams – that you simply need to work hard and never give up.

4. Patch Adams

Robin Williams – how can we go wrong here – acts as Patch Adams, a hilarious and offbeat doctor. Based on a true story, the movie follows Patch’s struggle with the medical industry and its cold approach to human health. Patch makes friends with patients, he works closely with the nurses, and argues that death should be treated with dignity and often humour. The film makes you laugh and it makes you cry. It encourages you to be different, to follow your intuition, and to never forget at the end of the day we are all humans seeking love, acceptance, and friendship. We’re all overcoming various difficulties and we’re all players in the game of life.

5. Schindler’s List

“Whoever saves one life, saves the world entire.”

Another film based on a true story, Schindler’s List transports us to Nazi Germany and the factory shop of a shrewd German businessman. Beautifully acted and shot, the film shows Oskar Schindler (Liam Neeson) become a humanitarian amid the barbaric Nazi reign. Oskar turns his factory into a refuge for Jews and is able to save the lives of about 1 100 people from Auschwitz. The film is a testament to the good in all of us.

There are many more fantastic films; perhaps I’ll share them in the future. Until then, curl up, put your comfy slacks on, and message a friend. After reading this list, I’m ready for a night at the movies and I’m sure you are too.

To the girls of tomorrow

Love

Fran Thring

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April 13, 2016

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One day I will have a daughter. I will have a little girl who will call me Mom. She’ll sit on the table while I am making dinner and we’ll talk in the way only moms and daughters can. One day she too will have a daughter, and I’ll be Grandmother.

I recently attended a girls conference called Colour. It’s a gathering of women who want to do something significant with their lives. I left the conference a new person. The impact on the lives of the other women had been profound. There is something so beautiful about the passing of time and the guidance of those who have gone before us. If you could say something to the girls who are going to come after you, what would you say? One day, when I have a daughter, I will tell her these things:

1. Be content

We live in a world of instant gratification where what we have is never enough. I’ll teach my daughter she won’t get everything she wants, when she wants it – and that this is okay.

2. Make mistakes

Everyone makes mistakes. What matters is that you keep trying and you learn from your errors.

3. Life isn’t easy

Good things come when we grit our teeth and work hard. We have to do our part, be brave, strong, and determined.

4. What you think matters

Don’t hide your opinions under a bush and don’t worry too much about what everyone thinks. You have a voice – speak and be proud.

5. You’re perfect as you are

Everyone is beautiful in their own way. Don’t listen to what some boys says, or some magazine tells you. You are unique and you are a woman – this is enough.

6. Cherish true friends

You’ll have lots of friends. Some good, some bad. Love and appreciate those that stick with you through the ups and downs. Don’t take them for granted. True friends are golden.

7. Kindness is key

A little kindness goes a long way. Even when you have every right to be rude, be kind. Be sensitive, listen, and understand. It will define who you are.

8. Accept change

Don’t fight change. It can make you a better person if you let it. It’s an inevitable part of life, and you may as well get good at it.

9. Have fun

No matter how bad things are, there is always an opportunity to see the other side. Life can get you down if you let it – don’t!

10. Pray

Times are going to come when you don’t have answers for every question; when things are going to get tough and you are going to need strength from something outside of yourself. That’s when you are going to have to get down on your knees and fight the war in prayer.

11. Set goals

Make decisions about your life and gain vision. If you don’t know where you are going it will be a lot harder to end up somewhere you want to be.

12. Family is important

Sometimes family is hard, but mostly it’s a place where you are loved, known, and accepted more than anywhere else.

13. Love isn’t like the movies

Yes, you will meet someone and fall in love. Don’t forget love is about understanding and compromise. Relationships take work and need to be nurtured if they are going to be good.

14. Be gentle but be strong

There will be times when you will need to draw out your arrows, and times when you are going to cry for hours. Read the situation and pick your reactions with wisdom.

15. You are never alone

If it feels like walls are closing in and there is nowhere to run, don’t be afraid. God is with you everywhere you go. He is closer than you know. If you forget everything else, remember that one truth and trust him.

Black girls are killin’ it!

Career

Fran Thring

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April 8, 2016

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Beyoncé uses the following words in her song Flawless:

We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller
We say to girls: “You can have ambition, but not too much
You should aim to be successful, but not too successful
Otherwise, you will threaten the man”

Beyoncé is one of many influential and inspiring black women out there killin’ it. Gone are the days of girls in the kitchen in an apron. Gone are gender stereotypes. A new era of black girl is on the scene and she is an ambitious powerhouse. Be inspired by this list of successful black girls.

1. Michelle Obama

She smart and she’s got natural style. She’s a writer and a lawyer. Why’s she famous? She’s America’s first black first lady and is married to one of the world’s most powerful men.

2. Oprah Winfrey

You can not write an article about influential black women without including the talk show queen herself, Oprah Winfrey. Where do we start? Oprah is the first woman in history to own and produce her own talk show. She is voted as one of the world’s most successful people, and she has managed to stay kind and down to earth through it all. If you need some Oprah wisdom, I would suggest reading What I know for sure, where she shares from life lessons and encourages you to be the best version of you.

3. Beyoncé

One of the most well loved pop icons of our time, the girl made booty famous and she’s all about girl power. Forbes magazine listed her as the most powerful female musician of 2015. She has won six Grammy awards, starred in Oscar-nominated movies and has an unshakeable platinum solo career.

4. Misty Copeland

Misty Copeland changed the face of ballet, a white-only sport, by becoming America’s first ever principal African-American ballet dancer. She is a sports icon with the the muscle tone of a goddess (don’t say I didn’t warn you) and she models for fitness brand Under Armour. She has challenged mindsets and broken through social barriers, despite being told she would have to give up ballet. Looking at her makes me want to do a squat and hearing her story makes me want to lead over challenges.

5. Serena Williams

Serena Jameka Williams is the No. 1 women’s singles tennis champion. In fact, if her arm muscles don’t scare you, this fact may: The Women’s Tennis Association has ranked her world No. 1 in singles on six separate occasions. She has 21 Grad Slam titles to her name and the girl is a machine.

6. Priscilla Shirer

Pricilla Shirer – she is, first and foremost, a mom, but give her a Bible and a platform and the girl can inspire thousands. Her latest book, Fervent, tells of how a woman overcomes the battles in her life through prayer and the words she speaks. Priscilla is a much loved writer, speaker, and actress who proudly stands for the gospel of Jesus Christ.

7. Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is a Nigerian writer. You may have come across her on a TED talk. Raised in a family of six, she is now a world-renowned author and speaker. With multiple degrees and award-winning books behind her name, she proves you don’t have to have it all; you have to work hard.

8. Halle Berry

Halle Berry was once a beauty queen but then turned actress. She has a highly successful acting career and became the first black #woman to win an Oscar for Best Actress, which is pretty cool. She also wears her hair short, which gives her a whole lot of extra cool points.

9. Mae Jemison

Mae Jemison is a NASA astronaut. She became the first black woman to travel in space when she went into orbit in 1992. If the space stuff doesn’t get ya, she has been awarded not one or two, but nine honorary doctorates in science, engineering, letters, and the humanities.

God never planned for anyone to feel small or less because of their race or sex. He makes everyone packed full of potential, including you and me. Let these girls inspire you to step up and step out in whatever area of life you wish. You got this girlfriends. Come on.

If only you would believe

Fran Thring

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April 6, 2016

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It was in the middle of a conversation about vision, life, and where we wanted to go when I suddenly realised something I hadn’t thought about.

Our everyday chat had turned serious and I was encouraging my friend: “You’re going to do it,” I said. I knew without any doubt she would see the things she dreamed of in her life.

Then, she asked me a question which made me pause: “You believe in me, but do you believe in you? Do you believe your writing is going to impact people?”

I hesitated. “No, I mean, I would love it if it does. Maybe. One day. Someday. But, I don’t really think it will.”

It’s always been easy for me to believe in the potential in everyone else, and so much harder for me to believe I’ll ever do anything great. I don’t think I’m alone in this. I had wonderful parents who believed in me, but it wasn’t enough. I had friends who were encouraging, but it wasn’t enough.

When I was 24 I gave my life to Jesus and learned in my heart, and not my head, that I had a Father in heaven who really, really believed in me. It was a turning point. I found new friends who believed in me. Eventually, there was only one person left who had to believe in me, and this was me.

But how? You don’t wake up in the morning thinking you are the Princess of Wales. No. I’m sure many many people wake up everyday convinced they are going to fail and they tell themselves this (this isn’t true by the way). I decided, if I wanted to believe in myself I would have to change what I was telling myself. I would have to get the Word of God and begin to apply it in my thinking and acting.

I did. I would wake up and tell myself good things about my future and my dreams (even though I didn’t really believe them yet). I kept on and on and on. Every morning and every day. Soon, I began to notice a difference. I was more energetic and focused. I started to share my opinion more often. I had less bad moods. People would come up to me and tell me I was glowing. More people respected me, and I had more and better friends.

Even though it was hard and some days I would feel low, I found that I became better about thinking positively about myself. I found my faith grew – my faith in God and his promises, as well as my faith in my potential. After a while, I found I could encourage people from a different place. I could encourage them from a place of confidence. I was no longer in the mindset of “oh I’m sure you can do it.” I was now in the mindset of “I know God can help me and he can help you.”

Sometimes, I think of the dreams that could have been. I think of what could have been invented if someone never gave up on what was in their heart. I think of the races run, people helped, art made and stories told which have never happened. I don’t want that to happen to me and I don’t want it to happen to you.

Today, I would like to encourage you. As someone who is still fighting for her dreams. As someone who doesn’t wake up every morning always believing in herself. As someone who says, “friend, I too struggle. Most of us do. But, we have to look to God, draw strength from him, and choose to believe.”

Life is too short for us to waste our potential. Too short to let insecurity steal from us. And too short to ignore God’s quiet voice of promise saying: I love you, believe in me. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams.

Leaving church?

Church
Faith

Fran Thring

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March 30, 2016

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“I haven’t seen Carol in ages.”

“Yeah, me neither. What happened to her?”

“Ahhh, I think she left church.”

“Really? But she seemed so into it….”

People leave church for many reasons. I think it’s sad when people leave church. I see my church as a small family, and in my mind you don’t leave your family. Sometimes, all the same, it is the right thing to move churches. Other times, you need to look at your motives and check if they are thought through. If you have changed churches three times in the last year, I would say you need some sticking power. Don’t base your church selection on how cool the pastor’s haircut is, but at the same time don’t stick in a church which lacks substance and depth. Don’t take the decision lightly – moving church is a big deal so think it through and speak to wise friends.

How do you know if its time to find a new church?

Circumstances

If you need to move churches because of health problems, your children’s education, or your family’s job, it really can’t be helped. You need to make sure you look after your family (this is first priority). If you emigrate to Australia, we don’t expect you to fly back to Zimbabwe every Sunday for church.

Competencies

We all need to be in an environment where we are given the opportunity to grow, and be challenged. If your current church does not challenge you, provide you with good friends, and you feel like you are stagnating, then it may be time to look at another option. Don’t stick around because your high school friend is there; be intentional about the place you choose to call your spiritual home.

Burn-out

Burn-out is sadly all too frequent amongst Christians. We just do too much, and become jaded and exhausted as a result. If you are feeling bitter towards helping at church then the best thing you can do is take a break. It may be time to change churches – but don’t jump to this conclusion. Chill out, keep a low profile for a while, and come back when you are rested and ready.

Poor leadership

If a church has division in the leadership and vision it will not be a positive or uplifting environment. No church is perfect, however, if the church is dysfunctional this can affect your family. Ideally a church has unity in vision and amongst the leaders. It should be moving forward.

Conduct

If there is evidence of lying, cheating, or sexual misconduct then you will need to consider leaving your church. If unethical practices are not dealt with in a wise and mature manner, and the church has lost trust, it may be wise to move on.

Doctrine

If the teaching at the church does not line up with the Bible, or your core values, your integrity may cause you to leave. If you are concerned about the teaching at a church, do some research and invite along a friend you trust. Don’t be someone who attends church without thinking.

Uncomfortable

If you are feeling manipulated, afraid, intimidated, or uncomfortable at church then you have every right to go and look for what you are after someplace else. Church should be a sanctuary which you are excited to go to. If you don’t want to go to church, you need to ask yourself why and make some decisions accordingly.

If you’ve never been to church – don’t let this put you off. Yes, the church has had some bad moments in history and yes, not all churches are happy and healthy. However, the church can be a great support and community for so many people. The church has and continues to do so much good for so many people. It’s the way God chose to show his presence on earth, broken and messed up; a beautiful mess. The church is not perfect, and you may need to leave a church for valid reasons, but don’t let this steal from you or get you down. I love my church and I believe you will find one you do too.

10 foods that pretend to be healthy, but aren’t

Health

Fran Thring

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March 29, 2016

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10 foods that pretend to be healthy, but aren’t

“I’m on a diet.”

My friend slaps a bag of vegetable crisps and some low fat dip on the table.

“I’m over it. I have to get healthy.”

I look at it with a sideways glance.

Every so often a friend of mine decides to go on a health kick. This is good. I’m all for it. We all need to detox and learn healthy eating habits. However, I’ve noticed that people often don’t know what healthy is. Which makes for a very ineffective healthy eating kick.

Here is your we-are-not-trying-to-catch-fish-or-sell-your-soul-on-the-organic-food-market guide to the main foods people mistakenly consider to be healthy.

1. Sugary cereals

Okay, just because Coco Pops now has ,00001mg more fibre than yesterday, does not mean it’s good for you. Nor is muesli good for you. I know, I’m sorry. Many before you have fallen prey to the “it has raisins in it” catch. No. The sugar content in muesli could rival a chocolate sundae with toppings. Maybe not quite, but it’s close.

2. Always ordering a salad

Don’t always order a salad. Half the restaurants in the world can’t make a decent salad. You are going to feel like you are missing out. Because you are. Plus, just because there are green leaves in something doesn’t mean there isn’t lots of bad stuff in it. Dressings are evil, croutons are evil, and loads of fatty chicken is evil.

3. Energy drinks

You go for a run, you burn 250 calories. You come home and think “oh, I need an energy drink to recover”, and you drink 400 calories. Even if you are horrible at maths, it does not look good. Energy drinks are never needed. Drink water if you come back from a run, and if you lack energy then eat.

4. Yoghurt

Everyone loves yoghurt. It lures you in with the picture of the happy children and the cows crunching away in the green pasture. An average mini yoghurt has more than 2 spoons of sugar. The cows would not be pleased. What? Yeah, you’ve seen those containers, they are barely bigger than two spoons. Sigh. Go for plain and add fruit.

5. Vegetable crips

I can put those charred beetroot crisps into my mouth like they are the last living food source on the planet. Unfortunately, the nutritional value in your bag of vegetable crisps is well, none. Or, not a lot. Those vegetables are fried to death. They may as well be cheese curls by the time they come out the other end.

6. Low fat

Hmmmm, I don’t know what health doctor brought this one into fashion. We are tricked into buying low fat margarine and low fat sauces. Yeah, your dip may be lower in fat, but have you read the label? What about the additives; what about the carbohydrates? I can make my pizza low fat by taking off some cheese, but does that make it good for me?

7. Honey

Okay, so I’m all for somethin’ sweet, and honey is natural, right? Yes, but that doesn’t mean the sugar content is lower, or that you can spread a layer on your toast that is thicker than the snow in an Alaskan winter and rationalise it. Get your sugar kick, by all means, but cut it down so you are using less each time.

8. Tomato sauce and peanut butter

Nobody thinks tomato sauce is bad because it’s all tomatoes. It’s not all tomatoes. There is a lot of sugar. Same deal with peanut butter. Try find a no-sugar peanut butter and try find other alternatives to tomato sauce (or sweet chilli, or BBQ – they all have a high sugar content).

9. Cauliflower bake

Yum. It’s a veggie that doesn’t taste like a veggie so we all love cauli bake. Thing is, although cauliflower is neutral, all of the cheese sauce isn’t. Be careful of what your veggies are baked or fried in; it can make all the difference to the nutrition and health factor in your side dish.

10. Popcorn

Popcorn is everyone’s “I want something bad, but I shouldn’t have something bad” treat. If popcorn is air popped and salted then it really isn’t too bad. It doesn’t have any nutrition, but its fairly harmless. However, if popcorn is cooked in oil, buttered, or made into caramel you can not kid yourself that you are having a healthy snack.

5 ways to survive a breakup

Relationships

Fran Thring

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March 25, 2016

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You’ve just broken up. I’m sorry friend. Go immediately to the nearest pharmacist and get yourself a box of soft (say no to raw flesh) tissues. Do not pass begin, do not look at any old photographs, do not go to any of your favourite places and please, I beg of you, do not listen to Adele. This is your how-to-get-through-a-breakup-alive post (aimed at girls, but guys there may something of value here too).

Breakups are so hard. Break my bones and I’ll drench myself in painkillers; cut open my skin and I’ll put tissue oil on the scar and forget about it; pull out my teeth and I will hate you and your pliers forever; but break my heart… whew, we’re in new territory. There is something gut-wrenching about pouring your heart and soul into a person, trusting them with everything, building your life and planning your future with them, and then having it all come apart at the seams (as Katy Perry puts it).

Breakups are a part of life and if we navigate them well we can come out the other side better, stronger, and wiser. As Kelly Clarkson says, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” I know, it’s hard to believe. Everything in us wants to drown our sorrows in Bridget Jones’ Dairy reruns, boxes of chocolates, and vows to never touch the opposite sex again. But if you apply maturity to breakup situations you may not have to book yourself into rehab.

1. Feel the pain: There’s only so much bottling up and ignoring that you can do. It is important that we process our breakup and grieve. If we bottle up our emotions and don’t talk to anyone about what happened, everything may come out in the middle of a business meeting or while you are heating up the pasta. Accept the process and do it well.

2. Assess your life: It is often after breakups that people start a new sport or a new hobby which completely changes the direction of their life. There is always something to learn from a breakup. Keep the learnings and leave the mess in the past. Look at your life and use this as an opportunity to work on some areas of weakness. Find something new to do and focus on that – not the emotions.

3. Share with your friends: We all go through rough times, and now is the time when its okay to lean a bit more on your friends and support structure. Be respectful and appreciate your friends, but also know there will be a time when you will be there for them. This may be a good opportunity to go to church and find some new friends who can pray for you and encourage you in the journey.

4. Give back: A great way to gain perspective and to avoid focusing on all your pain is to do something for someone else. You don’t have to open an orphanage – just do some research; there are loads of great NGOs who would love some help. Maybe you can visit an elderly person once a week. We can all do something in our lives and this is the perfect time to start.

5. Don’t wallow: It’s so easy to get bitter and wallow in our pain. Instead we should think about the things we do have in our life and be grateful for these. Despite what you have lost, you will still have many things to be thankful for. This is a bump in the journey but not the end. Go over it, keep your sights set on the future and be brave.

Don’t forget that no matter what has happened to you, God has a good plan. He has given you the spirit of an overcomer and you will get through. Don’t shut God out – he is waiting to bring you comfort, peace and perspective if you will let him. He loves you and cares for you more than any human could. He will be there for you through this and in the days to come. Trust him.

How mature are you really?

Fran Thring

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March 23, 2016

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“Oh my gosh, you’re so immature!” It’s the ultimate insult.

As humans, if we want to see things in our life work well – if we want good jobs, great relationships, and a healthy, successful life – then we need learn to mature. Okay now, before you move out of your apartment and book your place in the Old Age Home, hold your horses. Maturity is not about age, it’s about behaviour. You can be 10001 and be immature, or you can be 12 and be mature. Maturity at its essence comes down to this: “Treat others like you would like to be treated.” It’s in the Bible and the Bible has a lot of good stuff, ya know.

What does this look like? How do we know when someone is really being immature or when its just, uhhh, an unfair accusation because we don’t know what else to say in an argument? This is what maturity looks like:

1. Knowing when to be serious and when to be fun

Mature people can be silly too – they just know when to be silly. Don’t do this at work, at important events, or when someone has a serious issue to address.

2. Be the bigger person

You are going to get into fights with people; it’s a part of life. You are going to get into fights with immature people who are unkind. Don’t be the same way. Be kind and walk away.

3. Be open-minded

It’s so easy to make assumptions about a situation when you haven’t been in the other person’s shoes. Don’t judge people but be open to hearing their opinion and side of a story.

4. Be true to who you are

Mature people know who they are. They aren’t trying to be someone else, and they aren’t envious of someone else. They are simply doing their best with what God gave them.

5. Take responsibility

We need to take ownership of the things in our life which aren’t good and ask ourselves why. We can blame everyone around us, but that isn’t mature. Mature people admit when they make mistakes, adjust, and move forward.

6. Deal with conflict well

Keep your emotions and temper in check and learn when to discuss issues. Being passive-aggressive is not healthy but tearing someone else apart is not healthy either.

7. Have confidence in who you are

We all struggle with self doubt, but a mature person is positive about themselves. We are not perfect but we accept who we are and we believe God has a good plan for our lives.

8. Forgive quickly

Forgiveness is hard, especially when the other person has hurt you and you feel as if they are wrong. It doesn’t work to hold on to hurt though and to dwell on what someone has done. Let it go quickly and move on.

9. Think of other people

What would I feel like if that were me? How would I want someone to respond if I were in that situation? What would that make me feel like? If you consider the other person in your dealings in life you will find your decisions more mature and your empathy deeper.

10. Keep perspective

Don’t overreact or blow something out of proportion. Most matters are not as big as we make them out to be. Take time with God, chat to some good friends who you trust, and take a big breath. It’s going to be okay.

It’s not easy to be a mature person. It takes work, time, and character growth. It is important we are aware of the areas we need to grow in and able to put effort into getting better at this. The ultimate example of maturity and character was Jesus Christ. If you read about him in the Bible you will learn how to respond in situations and his example will help you to navigate challenges. Follow him and he will grow your character so you will be strong in the midst of the surging currents of life.

Don’t give up on your big dreams

Fran Thring

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March 18, 2016

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I guess at some point in our lives we all get to that place where we think, “Oh, but I thought I would be here by now.”

When I was a child I had everything figured out and I never doubted for a moment I would accomplish everything I set out to do. I had a lot of confidence in myself. I was raised in a great home with parents who believed in me and I filled my head with books and stories of successful adventures. My life would be no different – I would slay every dragon and win every prince.

Life isn’t a story book. It’s not Wonderland or Disneyland or the Faraway tree and many times the road to success has more rocks, rivers and detours then we would ever have imagined. Soon we find out it’s a whole lot easier to read a story of bravery and conquest than it ever is to be brave and fight. We also find out that just because we believe we are going to end up somewhere doesn’t mean it will happen. If we wish to achieve something then we need to work for it and set up some healthy mindsets to life that nobody teaches us in the storybooks.

1. If it doesn’t scare you then it’s not worth doing

You are always going to feel scared of something. There are scary things in life, and that’s that. Being brave doesn’t mean not being scared. It means doing things even though they scare you. Your vision for your life should scare you. You should take risks and take steps of faith. When we do something we are scared of, we change on the inside.

2. Embrace who you are and who you have become

Nobody is perfect and we’ve all got battle scars of some type. We’ve all been through things and had struggles. Don’t hate your struggles; don’t write yourself off because of them. If you have faith in God he can use these to make you stronger and to build you into a more interesting, more caring person. Regret is such a wasteful emotion. Take your regret and turn it around. Life experience is always a valuable thing if not coupled with bitterness.

3. Have a healthy perspective

We can look at something as the end of the world or simply a challenge to overcome – it’s all a matter of perspective. The same situation to two different people can appear completely different. We always have a choice: see the good or see the bad.

4. Hard work pays off

I know it feels like you’ll never get there. I think that thought three times a day, but if you don’t work hard, it’s a whole lot less likely to happen. It’s important to work hard and build your dream. God wants you to succeed; he wants you to achieve your dream and live a good life. He also knows we don’t value things which are given to us for free. He is interested in our character and he knows how good it can feel to accomplish something.

5. Don’t be afraid to fail

If you don’t fail you aren’t trying and taking risks. Fail often – that’s what they all say. We aren’t supposed to get everything right the first time. We’re supposed to learn, learn, learn, and grow, grow, grow. I know it can be embarrassing but it’s worth it.

6. Chase the things that matter

Our big dreams so often include things which don’t matter. Big houses, popularity, wild success, or fame. No wonder we aren’t happy even if we do achieve these things. The best dream is to build good relationships around you with quality people and work with purpose.

We’re not alone in our big dreams. We have a God in heaven who is dreaming with us and his dreams for us are bigger and have more dimensions than the picture in our heads. We have to trust him with our dreams and trust him with our life. God doesn’t give us dreams to do alone, he gives us dreams which challenge us; which force us to rely on him; which grow our character and make us find other people. Don’t give up on your big dream but let God into it.

Don’t like what you see in the mirror?

Health

Fran Thring

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March 11, 2016

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Every year at about this time people of the world look in the mirror and go “oh no,” or “what happened?” or “are we sure that was there yesterday?” All that New Year’s resolution has fizzled out faster than the gas in a bottled Coke you kept in your handbag for three days. That pure guilt at how much you ate over December kept you going for the month of January, the gym contract with the free Kauai kept you going for February, and now we’re at March. Now what? You have anti-exercise syndrome. You’ve even found this on Web MD. It’s a real thing.

What do you do about your growing waistline and growing lack of motivation?

Throw out your running shoes? Give up and go drown your feelings in a bowl of bacon and whipped cream?

The horrible thing about exercise and diet is that the more sad and emo and I-want-to-give-up you feel, the less likely you are to actually change anything. It’s okay.

So you’re sitting on the couch as you’re reading this with your slippers and a bowl of cheese Doritos chips wondering if this is you?

Let me help you:

• You don’t feel motivated to train anymore

• You welcomed sugar back into your life

• Your pants are tighter today than they were a year ago

• You feel lethargic and tired.

• You feel trapped and sleepy

• You’re close to giving up on yourself and the people that want to help.

If that feels about right, here’s the key factor to change: it all starts with your mind.

When you focus on all of the things that you hate – like the size of your thighs, your energy levels, the shape of your butt, or the way your belly looks – then you’re putting all of your energy into the negative stuff.

1. Take it one battle at a time

You may have five, 10, 25 or 50 kilos to lose before you reach your perfect weight—and, boy, that can be overwhelming. The truth is weight loss like that won’t happen overnight—it takes months of dedication. Which is not a great thought – I get it.

Don’t worry about winning the entire war today, instead focus on conquering one battle at a time. Take it one meal at a time, and one day at a time. A healthy meal, a good workout, and you’ve won a battle. Remember, 50 kilos is broken down into 350 000 calories. Sure, that sounds like a lot, but all you have to do is focus on burning more calories than you take in today – in the end weight loss will be inevitable.

2. Use a trigger

How many times throughout your day do you find yourself plagued with negative thoughts? I’m too fat. I’ll never look as good as I used to. I’m not attractive.Yikes! Thoughts like these will ruin your chance at regaining your six pack – they are total momentum killers.

Here’s a tip: whenever a negative thought enters your mind instantly do the following:

• Breathe out and squeeze your abs for five seconds – three times

• Throw away any junk food within arms reach

• Plan to exercise that day

Make negative thoughts a trigger to take positive action toward your goal.

3. See what you want

If you have weight to lose, mirrors are a nightmare. Every lump seems to jump out with alarming illumination. And it doesn’t help that most of us see things as worse than they really are.

When was the last time you closed your eyes and pictured the body that you wished you had? It may sound weird, but I’m serious. Your mind is very impressionable, and when you bombard it with only the negative then you will be stuck on that image.

Take time each day to visualise your ideal body. Close your eyes and put yourself in that ideal body – feel what it feels like to be fit.

4. Get serious

Sooner or later you will decide that you are fed up with your Doritos and your sad feelings. You will decide that your health is important. You will decide that you deserve to look great. And you will do what it takes to achieve amazing results.

Identify your goals, find workout programmes that you enjoy and create a routine that works with your schedule. It’s that simple. You think you can’t do it, but you can. You really can.

Fran Thring

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