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Ryniel Muthusami

Your thoughts are powerful

Ryniel Muthusami
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Your thoughts are powerful

We often hear the saying ‘The battlefield is in our minds’, but more often than not we forget and underestimate what a powerful statement this is. Our thoughts literally influence every aspect of our lives, our behavior, and relationships. We end up having a really bad day at work because we woke up thinking about how awfully long the week will be. We fight with our partners because we’re already thinking about how we’ll cope financially this month. We are miserable even before we get home at night because all the way on the bus we were thinking about how we really don’t want to go home.

The crazy thing about all of this is, you actually have the ability to choose your thoughts! You have the ability to decide what stays and what has to go! What is good for you and what is bad! What will make you entirely miserable and what will give you hope!  This may seem like an impossible task when emotions are high, but think about this for a few seconds. How many times has acting without thinking landed you in some serious trouble?

We live through our thoughts and because it is such an important part of who we are, we should make it a priority to be intentional about it.

Joyce Meyer has this cool saying that just stuck with me:

“Make sure that you think about what you’re thinking about.”

The mind is complex in understanding most times that you not only purposely think right thoughts, but that you go the extra mile and speak them out loud as personal confessions of faith (see Mark 4:24).

Our thoughts are not excluded from our reverence to God. It is a big part of it, choosing to think positively, choosing to believe what God says, choosing to think about His goodness is a sign that you’re acknowledging His place in your life.

The Bible tells us very simply that ‘As a man thinks, so he is’.  Your thoughts have tremendous power, set them straight today!

The perfect gift you can bring to your relationship

Ryniel Muthusami
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The perfect gift you can bring to your relationship

Desiring to have someone to do life with is admirable. God created us to gravitate towards relationships, no matter the nature of it. On the face of it a relationship may seem like it’s all holding hands and roses but truthfully, relationships are hard work.  Relationships are important in our character building but they are also something we need to prepare for. Sunsets and Valentine’s Day gifts are amazing, but the best gift you can give someone who you are in a  relationship with is knowing who you are. Here are some of the benefits:

Knowing who you are  includes knowing what you bring to the table

This takes time, which is why you often hear the constant lecture about embracing your singleness. It is that period when you are alone that you will best discover who God is and what He has called you to be. This includes having the capability to clearly identify your strengths and weaknesses.

Knowing who you are positions you in a place of security.

Someone who is secure oozes confidence and has the capacity to think things through. They also understands that people are vulnerable to making mistakes, and is not moved when these errors occur. A secure person finds their roots in God and not in unfair expectations of people.

Knowing who you are protects your individuality and validates that.

I constantly remind myself that:

“Although I may be dating now, my partner is not all there is to me. I have ambitions and goals that I need to reach, that are my responsibility to complete”.

You had a life before you met your other half and you need to continue to live after you meet your partner. Your life is not a stop street of stagnation.

Knowing who you are keeps you focused.

Though your boyfriend may be great, on the days when he’s not around you need to be able to figure things out on your own. Your life is not in his hands, it belongs to God.

Knowing who you are enhances your relationships

Any relationship that is built on God is a fantastic candidate for marriage. When two people who know what God has called them to be combine their vision powerful things take place and a solid foundation is a fantastic base to build a home on.

Are you confused about where you are at in life, or would you like to find out who you are and what God says about you? Please watch this video to find out.

Surviving the Friend-Zone

Ryniel Muthusami
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Surviving the Friend-Zone

Have you ever wanted to take your friendship with someone to the next level, only to find out that the object of your desires doesn’t want to move with you and rejects your advances.  If you’ve experienced this, I’m sorry to say but, you’ve been ‘friend-zoned’. Being ‘friend-zoned’ is probably one of the world’s top 5 most embarrassing things that could happen to you. It makes everything awkward, your friendship suffers a blow and so does your self-esteem.  Although, at the time it may seem like the end of the world, trust me, it’s not.

Here are 5 keys to survive being Friend zone.

Accept that it happened.

The sooner you realize that this actually happened, the better. Often, when we are humiliated we tend to brush it off as if it never happened. The reality is bad things happen to great people all the time. It’s one of the complexities of life.

Forgive yourself

You are not a loser. You took a risk and it didn’t pay off, that’s fine. Forgive yourself and do so quickly, because beating yourself up will just make everything worst.  Besides every failure presents us with an opportunity to learn.  Take the lesson and run with it.

Channel your disappointment

Most times when we feel disappointment, we project it through our behavior. Make sure you find a healthy release. When I experience disappointment, I pray. Sometimes I really don’t feel like it, but it’s better than sending that awkward text message because you’re acting out of emotion.

Don’t run

You’re not a prisoner to anyone or anything. You still have the freedom to do whatever you did before. Don’t allow the disappointment to keep you bound to the humiliation of what happened. You are going to be okay.  That’s a promise.

You are enough

Being friend-zoned is not based on your value. You are enough! You may not have received what you thought you would, but take this in your stride. A time will come when you’re going to think about this and say  “I can see it now”.  All your disappointment and every stumbling block will finally make sense.

 

 

What if you could take 1Africa where ever you go?

Ryniel Muthusami
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What if you could take 1Africa where ever you go?

What if a place existed where all people could gather?

A place created to harness and showcase the creativity and innovation of the millions who frequent it. A place that draws out compelling and real stories of a continent so rich in culture that the world draws inspiration from its wealth. What if at this very place, people could keep their fingers on the pulse and be kept inside the loop of entertainment, politics, technology and pop culture, while at the same time be taken on a journey of self-discovery and spiritual awareness.

What if this place was real and what if this place could help us all get connected to a real love, a real sense of redemption and salvation, a real God. What if this place did exist and what if you have already arrived, right here, right now. Online.

THIS IS 1AFRICA

What if we told you, you could take 1Africa with you where ever you go by downloading these amazing backgrounds.

Download the links below and personalise your phones and computers and start a conversation.

Download 1A Desktop background here

Download 1A Desktop Background here

Download 1A Cellphone background

Download 1A Cellphone Background 

5 Things to Remember When You Think You’re Not Good Enough

Ryniel Muthusami
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5 Things to Remember When You Think You’re Not Good Enough

There is generally a lot of pressure to compete in our culture. We feel as if there is something wrong with us when, for example, we don’t make a certain amount of income, don’t have a long list of friends, don’t look a certain way and don’t accomplish things that other people do. We’re just too hard on ourselves and after taking a ‘self-beating’ too many times, it really clouds our judgment and perspective on things and life in general.

Here are 5 things to remember the next time you think you’re not good enough:

  1. Your mind can be a very convincing liar

Your mind will always be plagued by thoughts, but you have the ability to decide which of them are good for you and which of them are destructive. Learn to get rid of the bad ones as soon as you can. Don’t believe everything you think.

  1. You can’t hate your way into loving yourself

Constantly telling yourself that you are an utter failure won’t ever guarantee your success. People go through strenuous processes to achieve self-love, but the most important part of the process is to realize that hating yourself will never bring you closer to loving yourself. It’s not part of the process and it is not the solution either.

  1. You’re a legit miracle

Have you ever looked up the biology of the human make-up? The science alone is amazing. There are no two people on this earth who are the same. Great thing about this is that it means you were completely intentional and the world is in need of you.

  1. Forgive yourself, you are doing the best you can

Maybe your progress is not as fast as others, maybe it will never be, maybe it is just not for you… these are things you need to make peace with. There are things you are great at that others would take years to master. You’re doing great!

  1. You have all that you need to achieve that which has been purposed for you

Before you were born God saw you and gifted you with everything required to live the life He made you for.  Know that you are here for a purpose and you fit into God’s plan.

You are  more than enough!

What makes your opinion a good candidate for the Truth?

Ryniel Muthusami
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What makes your opinion a good candidate for the Truth?

Social media has been dubbed by many as ‘the evil’ of the millennial generation. Radical feminists, philosophers, and politicians are popping up all over our news feeds, with very strong and influential opinions attracting thousands to their following.

Unfortunately, this influence is not always to the greater benefit of society. Under the banner of ‘freedom of speech’ there is not really much that can be done concerning our opinions. We have a right to express them, but on the flip side, is it really that important? And what really makes our opinions good candidates for the truth?

Perhaps the fact that we have access to the world at a touch of a button is part of the reason we, at times, post our opinions impulsively, exerting our beliefs, opinions, and ideologies on to our following, who could either agree, disagree, be influenced and even share our opinions with others.

Without focusing too much on the negative, we have neglected to examine how much we can actually positively influence and enhance other people’s lives by examining what we post. I usually use a three-point test:

1. What does your post aim to evoke?

Ideally, I always make sure that my post aims to encourage people. That is the emotion I want to evoke. When I am aiming to rally support behind a cause. The alarm bells go off, then I know I need to check exactly what my intentions are in posting around a controversial topic especially.

2. Think about the effectiveness about what you want to post

Has what you want to say already been said? Will it contribute negatively towards someone’s day? Will it cause more harm than good?

3. Think about the most effective way to articulate your post

Sometimes it’s not what we say, but how we say it. Choose your words carefully, in a way that won’t distort the actual message you want to get across.

What makes your opinion a good candidate for the truth?

Ever been a victim of Social Bullies?

Ryniel Muthusami
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Ever been a victim of Social Bullies?

Have you ever been invited to a party or get together and felt like an absolute outcast? Or been in a conversation where you are totally ignored, spoken over or the reason why everyone around you is laughing for no apparent reason? Then you dear friend have experienced the wrath of social bullies.

As I grew older and weirder, I was exposed to other forms of bullying. Super subtle in its execution, but horrific in its effect.  Social bullying basically involves:

“The people, who perceive themselves to be on top of the food chain in our social circles. Primary characteristics include: considering other people’s failures as their success, finding creative ways to expose people’s weaknesses, gossip, slander, alienation and isolation of their victims”

Here’s how I overcame these horrible encounters…and how you can too.

Concerning your failures

Please become comfortable with the fact that failure is an inevitable fact. Nobody is immune from it. Whether it is in your career, relationship or family life.  Sometimes social bullies will try to exploit your failures to secure social capital. When this happens, I want to say  one thing

Rest assured that they have failed too!

Also, people in your company are not as oblivious to life as you think they are. Exploiting your failures, really only makes them look bad, not you! Cheer up!

Concerning your weaknesses

Failure and weaknesses are closely linked. Our weaknesses can generally do two things, propel failure or propel success.  In this case, your weaknesses will be rigorously categorized according to what you wear, what you do, your hair, who you date and as you get older your pay grade will become a determining factor too.

You need to learn to become comfortable in your own skin, and if you’re not, please start. Learn to like yourself enough to block out the noise of people who are trying to convince others not to.  Funnily enough, the only reason why they’re exposing you, is because you’re their weakness.

The  Gossip

Those who gossip to you, gossip about you

“What Susie said about Sally, says more about Susie than it does about Sally”.

Universally, everyone knows this. It’s just in real-time people generally find gossip pleasurable, but over time, or the very next day, motives are questioned and intensely analyzed.Gossip has a mythical principle, but slander is head on assaulting character. I usually nip this in the bud as soon as it happens. Confront the issue and then try to find a way to resolve the matter. Anything else will just aggravate it, so learn to sort things out then let it ago.

The Alienation and Isolation

Great! This presents you with the opportunity to do some housekeeping! Weed out the people who think you’re not good enough and embrace those who do. You don’t get to be the social butterfly, you don’t need to be a crowd pleaser.

The world needs you to be you!

 

 

Are you stuck in a drought?

Ryniel Muthusami
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Are you stuck in a drought?

I live in Cape Town and thanks to a dryer than normal summer my city currently has less than 100 days of water left. It has been the worst drought our province has ever experienced and as the days go by the anxiety mounts, with the pressing question being: “What now”?

In a much deeper sense, there are  valuable lessons that could be learnt through this ‘dry’ experience. I, for one have been through a drought before, it may not have been a lack of a natural resource as valuable as water, but I have gone through dry seasons in my life, where I too asked the question: “What now”? Whether it be financially, emotionally or spiritually, dry seasons are inevitable,

Through these dry seasons one thing was my absolute motivation. That was hope. The belief that things will eventually get better and well…when it eventually did, you know what they say ‘When it rains it pours’ and believe me, it did.

Here are three things that got me through my drought, I am sure it will get you through yours:

Prayer

Prayer is a resource and it is important that we actually understand this. It is what ignites our hope in God and helps us carry that hope through our dry seasons. Prayer is what will see you through.

A positive attitude

Negativity is so exhausting and an absolute buzz kill. As hard as it may be, stay positive and think positively! Being negative won’t change your current situation, it will only make it worst and make you such a misery to be around.

A healthy perception

After many droughts, I finally came to this conclusion: I can either be stuck in my pity party or I could ‘come to the party’ and embrace the valuable lessons embedded in the space I find myself. It’s really just a matter of perception. Remarkably, through most of my dry seasons, I have always been reminded to persevere and conquer.

No matter what kind of drought you are facing, hang in there and know that the rain is on it’s way. You’ll be just fine.

 

 

 

 

Fancy a quick fix?

Ryniel Muthusami
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Fancy a quick fix?

Instant gratification is something we’re all fans of. You can literally type any problem into Google and have a comprehensive list of solutions in seconds, pull up at a drive through and grab your favorite meal, and it will be done by the time you reach the next traffic light. Longing for a holiday? You can have a virtual experience online or scroll through your Facebook timeline and envy your friends’ lived experiences.

We have all yearned for a quick fix at some point in our lives, without taking into consideration its effects.  ‘The easy way out’ has become much more than a meal preference and in the 21st century, progress has been characterized by speed and agility ‘how can I get ahead and stay ahead?’

The world has never been more technologically advanced than it is now. In fact, keeping up can be such an overwhelming experience, instead of allowing these technological luxuries to service our needs, it has become a vice versa experience, which totally disconnects us from our relationships, families and the things money can’t buy.

We need to remember that the ‘easy way out’ does not apply to every aspect of our lives. The best successes in life are those that took time, experiences and close attention. Here’s how you can get back there:

Be Present

Take time out of the chaos of the day and actually look around you. What are you grateful for? What are the things that are happening in the lives of your colleagues? Are there any changes in your environment? Take 10 minutes to take in where you’re at, how you are feeling and ask others around you, how they’re feeling.

Pay attention

When last have you actually read a message or email, without looking at the subject line to provide you with a brief synopsis? When last have you actually listened? Or have you been too busy hearing the complaints of others, to actually tune into the anxiety they’re feeling, just by listening to the murmurs in their voice. Take time to go and buy the gift, instead of ordering it online. Put some passion into your actions.

Value Time

Remember to remember that time is valuable. It is a luxury. In fact all you have is time. Is it really worth spending on a virtual experience, for most of your day? Instead of spending your Sunday on Twitter, how about visiting a friend or taking your family for a picnic. Remember how it feels to build memories with the people you value most.

When last have you taken some time to pay attention to the things that really matter?

Dream Bigger!

Ryniel Muthusami
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Dream Bigger!

I remember buying a notebook for a friend a while back. It was a simple thin-lined notebook and the cover read “Dream Big”. It didn’t mean much to me other than just being a pretty gold font on a colourful cover.

Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily lives, on the hustle and bustle that we forget to spend a little time dreaming – not dreaming about material things but truly spending time dreaming about our future. The thing is, it’s not enough to just dream – you have to dream bigger!

How do you dream big?

It’s sounds crazy but the answer is simple! Think up the most impossible thing that you could ever do and have desired to do and give it to God. Why you ask? Simple. Dreams are linked to desire. If your intentions are pure and your heart in the right place a dream is just a plan in action for God, especially because he knows the desires of our hearts.

Recently someone said I make them want to dream bigger and I couldn’t understand why they would say that because to me dreaming big is normal!  To me it’s easy to dream because I know that all things are possible with God and that nothing is impossible if you have faith! I believe my true calling and purpose on this earth is to help people realise their gold, tell their stories and to dream that little bit bigger! I will do all I can to encourage others and spur them on to dream a bigger dream!

I’ve begun to believe that our generation has been struggling to dream bigger. They have struggled to understand that fame or money isn’t the real dream, happiness is!

My question is to you – what are you going to dream bigger about?

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