Recently I was going through old photo albums with my children looking at pictures from my childhood. My kids love to see photographs of family members when they were younger and ask questions about what we were like, where we lived and all the rest. They love the thought of me, their mommy, being little like them. It’s a novel thought that the person they depend upon and go to for just about everything was once a little person who was dependent on someone else.
Still the same ‘me’
The funny thing about this perspective is that regardless of the fact that I’ve been married for over a decade, finished high school 20 years ago (yes, that is a terrifying thought), and have four babies of my own, is that I still feel the same as I did in my early twenties and I think I always will. The reality of life, however, means that my life now is very different to the life I lived then. To put it plainly, I’ve grown up.
Living in Neverland
It happens to us all (or at least it should). Our childhood and teenage years are (hopefully) a very short time in comparison to our overall life span. It’s possibly part of the reason why so many people seem eager to hang onto their younger selves for as long as they can. You only have to google “peter pan generation” and you’ll see what I mean. More and more people are trying to avoid responsibility and commitment, live off their parents, and stay “forever young”. Is it any wonder then that there is some confusion as to how to act your age? Isn’t it boring to be old? When do you start “settling down” and growing up? Do you have to do these things or can you remain young and free forever?
Growing up vs. growing old
I think even before you begin to answer these questions you have to realise that there is a difference between growing up and growing old. As a child, life is full of wonder, exploration, and excitement. There is fun to be found in most circumstances. In a paper on humour and stress, Mary Sherman explains that children laugh on average between 300 and 500 times a day, compared to a feeble 15 times for most adults. These are the things that tend to get lost when we grow old. Being old talks of being tired, worn, and possibly even losing something. Growing up is more about maturing and maturity is about growing, adding to, and developing. It’s about taking the wonderful things from your youth and adding to them all the things about being an adult you wished for but didn’t have when you were young.
Young at heart
The Bible talks about the fact that as we grow we put aside childish things but it also tells us that that we should remain child-like. It sounds like a contradiction but all it really means is that we shouldn’t be afraid to grow up. Maturing is a natural and important part of life but during the process of growing up, we must remember to hang on to the child-like joy and openness that characterises a young and vital existence.