Wouldn’t it be nice if life had an undo button for those moments when you said something you shouldn’t have? How about those moments when you make a decision that you look back on afterwards and wonder what you were thinking? It’s normal to have a few things that you would like to do differently. Most of us have occasions when a different choice would have been better, or when we should have done something and didn’t.
Crying over spilt milk
Regardless of whether your regret is over something insignificant or over something life changing – the fact that it has happened and you are able to regret it means that it can’t be changed. What’s done is done and probably can’t be erased. However, just because it’s happened doesn’t mean that it can’t be fixed or action can’t be taken to turn the consequences of what you’ve done (or haven’t done) around. You don’t need to be haunted by your regrets forever; there are ways to move on from your mistakes and be better in the future.
- Don’t be too hard on yourself
Everyone makes mistakes. We all say things or do things we shouldn’t. Everyone has a lapse in judgement at one time or another and it’s important to remember that you’re only human.
- Failure isn’t fatal
Just because you’ve made a wrong choice or said the wrong thing doesn’t mean the world is going to end. Failing to be perfect or always getting it right doesn’t discount you from ever succeeding again. If you fall, instead of regretting the fall, you need to pick yourself up and try again.
- Time to move on
Regrets on their own will never achieve anything other than to tie you to your past. Sadness and remorse over missed opportunities can spur you on to do better in the future but only if you let go and move on to the next chance to get it right.
- Take responsibility
Sometimes things happen that are beyond our control but often it’s our own choices that cause us pain. It’s important realise that our actions and decisions have consequences, both good and bad, and that we should take responsibility when things don’t turn out the way we would have liked. It’s empowering to realise that you’re not a victim but have the power to choose and make wiser decisions going forward.
- Forgive yourself
Sometimes the hardest person to forgive is ourselves. We should have known better. We should have acted differently. Yes, maybe that’s true – but constantly holding your own mistakes against yourself isn’t going to change the past or help you move beyond those regrets.
It would be nice to go through life without the pain of regretting but it isn’t always possible. The good news is that our mistakes, instead of meaning our destruction, can be used for good. The apostle Paul talks about this in the Bible. He wrote that there is no regret over past mistakes if the sadness caused by our poor choices leads us to turn and repent of the things we’ve done wrong or badly and look instead to God.
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