There’s a French saying which, when translated to English, reads: “At a Chinese restaurant, the neighbour’s plate always seems to be the best”. Isn’t that the story of life? The grass always seems greener on the other side, we think! If I’m to be brutally honest, I’ll admit to having peeped at my friends’ lives at some point and thought to myself that things are going better for them; they’ve moved forward in life; I’m left behind; life is passing me by.
Times are difficult all over the world. To quote a colleague of mine: “The reality is that we live in trying times and many of us feel pressed from all sides. The average young person in Africa struggles to make real sense of life and, because the socio-economic climate on our continent is challenging, it’s not always easy to get by.” Though this is the reality of our times, there are those around us who are flourishing in a major way. And the temptation is to ask: “why them and not me”?
Sometimes, being overwhelmed by our difficulties and trying to make sense of life is what leads us to begin to look around and see if life is as tough for everyone as it is for us. And in doing that, we envy! But you also meet those for whom envy is a way of life. It doesn’t matter what they’ve got, it’s not enough, for them – that neighbour on the right is and has everything they want in this life but don’t have. They’ve got the perfect family, the most adorable kids – everything is stunning! The grass could appear greener from a distance, but is it always that green when we’re up close? I don’t know!
Coming to our question: Is it wrong to envy others? Rather than answering this question, I’ll shed some light on what envy does and let you decide for yourself if envy is wrong or not:
- Envy makes you feel inferior to others. It not only devalues you but it devalues others too. It destroys relationships.
- It makes you feel miserable, bitter and unappreciative of the good things you have and could enjoy about your own life. It also causes you to miss out on sharing in the joy of celebrating the progress of others.
- Envy is a thief of time and energy. The time spent looking at what others have or don’t have, what they’re up and how things are working for them is time and energy you could invest in your own life, focusing on how you can work and improve your life.
I need to say though, that having envied someone or being jealous of someone’s progress doesn’t make you a bad person. Even the wisest and most admirable person you know, made wrong choices and mistakes at some point through their journey to become who they are today. That is life! No one gets things right instantly. Sometimes we even find ourselves doing things we never wished to do. This doesn’t define who we are. Here at 1Africa we strongly believe that we each were made for a unique purpose. We also believe that God who made us, longs for each of us to live a healthy life and to thrive in all areas of our lives. Look at it this way, He is a Father! His heart beats for you, just like any father’s heart will beat to see his/her child confident in who they are and moving forward in life. Your reality may not match this truth but it can and it will. Consider letting God into your life and, once you find your identity in Him, you will not have to envy anyone. He will lead you to discover the many treasures He placed within you and help you to be content in all circumstances. There’s a banner below which, if you click on it, will lead you to a video where we share more about God and how you can begin a relationship with Him.