If we had to focus our energy onto being “pro-parenting”, instead of constantly debating back and forth with “natural birth vs c-section birth, breast milk vs formula, stay-at-home mom vs working mom, co-sleeping vs independent ‘cry it out’ sleeping methods, preschool vs play school vs no school and all the rest” we would be better for it as a community of parents. As a mom, I can so get why the above mentioned can be a sensitive topic – it’s personal from parent to parent. What I don’t get is the “mom shaming”, the attacking (verbally) and the judging of moms and their chosen lifestyles.

We tend to forget, that what works for one will not necessarily work for others. Also, we have no clue as to what the reasons are for said choices, because it’s personal. Yet, as women, we tend to go there, and we tend to share our opinions without being sensitive to others opinions and personal choices. What if a mother couldn’t afford to have her child at home with a nanny? What if a mother couldn’t produce breast milk? What if a mother struggled with post natal depression? What if a mother wanted to work and be a mom?

Does that make her a bad mom?

NO, not at all!

The questions we should be asking ourselves are:

  • Why does it bother us so much?
  • Why does it make us uncomfortable?
  • Or why does it make us want to shame them with our personal opinions and views on the matter?

We can’t make assumptions about other moms and their choices when we haven’t walked in their shoes, or made the effort to know their full story. Being a mom is not a competition – there is no prize for being the perfect mom. Besides I think we all fall short somehow when it comes to parenting, even on our good days! All of us moms just want the best for our children, and want to do our best with the season of life we are in. Mom’s already have to fight off constant “mom guilt”, why do we need to add to that by “mom shaming” one another. We are in this together after all. If anyone should get the reality of motherhood – it is us moms. Therefore, we need to rally together in love. We need to offer support, kindness, love and encouragement. Motherhood isn’t always easy, and it most certainly has its days – therefore, we need each other to cheer one another on.

Let’s rather be pro-parenting, and encourage one another, as we set out to do the best with what we have, in the season we find ourselves in.