Have you ever heard of a carnivorous plant? There is one which I have recently become aware of: the Pitcher plant. Have you ever heard of or seen a Pitcher plant? They come in many different varieties and are quite an extraordinary plant. They grow in areas where the soil is deficient in nutrients and where the soil is too acidic for most other plants.

So how does the Pitcher plant get the nutrients it needs? Well it’s quite incredible: the pitcher plant forms its leaves into a cup shape. Inside these cups or pitchers is a small body of trapped water. The plants lure insects in by their beauty – the flowers can be visually attractive (but that’s not always the case) – and by secreting a sweet smelling nectar onto the rim of the cup. The nectar on the rim makes the rim extremely slippery, causing any insect gullible enough to be fooled by the sweet smells and sights of this deadly flower to fall down into the cup and into the water, where digestive fluids secreted by the plant finish the job.

Besides the water keeping the victim trapped, there are also downward facing hairs on the side walls that help ensure the victim does not escape. Many insects get seduced to their doom. Beautiful and deadly to those who seek to taste of its sweet nectar, the Pitcher plant takes what it needs from its victims and moves on.

This plant made me think of an experience I once had with a woman – beautiful, but deadly (and of course this doesn’t only apply to women – so watch out for those guys, ladies!). She lured me in with her sweet smelling nectar. Luckily for me, I managed to keep myself from falling into the cup but I had been drawn in and I had been on that slippery rim. I had been extremely close to falling in when I came to my senses and even though nothing physical ever happened with this other woman, I had caused a deep wound within my wife and within my marriage.

Adultery can be as simple as just walking the rim of a Pitcher plant, yet never falling in. But walking the rim and not falling in is the exception, rather than the rule. Most of the time, the fall is inevitable.

“For the lips of an immoral/adulterous woman are as sweet as honey and her mouth is smoother than oil. But in the end she is as bitter as poison, as dangerous as a double-edged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave.”

This verse in Proverbs 5:3-5 gives us quite a clear picture of just how dangerous it is to play around with an adulterous and immoral person. Here are some hard truths you can take away with you that could keep you from becoming “plant food”.

  1. Adultery really does become a trap: Most married men, once they’ve had an affair, wish that they could go back to their wife and kids, but often the wife is unable to get over the severe hurt and betrayal of her trust. This is true for women who get caught up in affairs as well. The damage is done, and trust, once broken, is the hardest of things to restore. There is always hope for reconciliation – but it’s not the kind of scenario you want to find yourself in in the first place.
  1. Most relationships formed out of adultery don’t last long: The statistics show that most relationships that start out of adultery do not last more than two years. That is because the relationship was initiated on the basis of lust and sex, and not on a firm foundation that will form a healthy, stable, and long-lasting relationship. Most times, paranoia destroys the relationship. Each party will constantly be questioning the other’s loyalty – after all, the entire relationship began through an act of disloyalty.
  1. Blackmailed: If the person in the affair has managed to keep it a secret, and no one knows a thing about it, the “other woman” or “other man” has a hold. This makes it very hard to break off the relationship, because if there is a decision to break it off, the other partner could use blackmail to keep things going. Threatening to “spill the beans” could prolong an adulterous relationship.
  1. Adultery affects everyone: It is not only the marriage partner and kids that are destroyed by adultery. The person who starts the adulterous relationship gets destroyed, along with the “other” man or woman. No one ever walks away better off. Family bonds are destroyed as well. Everything changes. This is exactly why adultery is such a key weapon that Satan uses. He loves seeing that nuclear bomb go off – destroying families and the lives of everyone involved.

Don’t be like those stupid insects who are lured in by sweet smelling nectar and pretty looks. Maybe you have been married for a few years now and life has become dull and not at all how you thought it ought to be… To you I say beware, for that sweet nectar may seem even more intriguing in times where marital issues are more evident.

If you are struggling with a situation that seems like a trap, the best possible way out is by speaking the truth. Darkness cannot defeat the light. Cast light on what is happening, be truthful, and the darkness will flee. If you would like to find out more or need someone to chat to, please click the pop-up or link below.