Falling in love is easy, but staying in love is very special. 

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and during this time we can’t help but feel a stir of emotions. When I walk past all of the cute gifting ideas at the shops, I can’t help but pause for a little bit longer and ponder on how many Valentine’s Days I spent with my husband. Whilst I must look really odd to other shoppers, I can’t help but giggle to myself when I think of all the memories we have shared together over the years. After my little memory flashback scene, I buy three Valentine’s chocolates – one for me of course – then one for my husband and one for my son.

Whilst nibbling on my chocolate I can’t help but think to myself: “Wow, this chocolate is so good, why didn’t I buy more?” Then, more importantly, I think about how blessed I am in my marriage, and how special the dynamic of my little family is. My heart feels full when I think of my husband and when I think of my son!

Now you may be thinking to yourself: “She sounds like she has the perfect life, the dream family, such a lucky girl!” When in essence, my husband and I have worked very hard at keeping our marriage strong. However, this came from the bumping of heads (often), to learning through failing (often), and after every fall we decided to always come back stronger as a team!

The truth is that behind closed doors, behind every “happy couple” social media picture, lies a story. The truth behind every strong marriage lies within the mutual understanding that love requires constant effort from both individuals within a marriage. If you do not make the time to invest in and nurture your marriage, you can’t expect it to flourish; you also can’t be shocked or feel blindsided when you know you haven’t been intentional about looking after it.

THE TRUTH ABOUT LOVE

Over the years a few thoughts and values have helped my husband and I in our marriage, and I am hoping that they may encourage you to keep on pursuing the gold within your marriage.

1. Your husband/wife is not perfect.

2. No marriage is perfect.

3. Do not become lazy of familiar within your marriage.

4. Believe in the best of your partner.

5. Always encourage one another.

6. Forgive quickly.

7. Love needs to be protected, and it needs to be nurtured.

8. Great love takes time.

9. Dating your partner never gets old!

10. Be honest with your feelings.

11.  Confront and speak the truth with love and with the greatest of respect for your partner.

12 . Never stop dreaming together.

We live in a world where we want things to happen fast, and we just want fast results. Imagine if we could all just upgrade our marriage by downloading it with a click of a finger? That would be amazing right, if not easy! But in reality, we need to get our hands dirty, we need to be intentional, and we need to work hard and keep our marriages strong and healthy! When we decided to marry our significant others, we vowed to love them, to cherish them no matter the season!

I love this verse that was read at our wedding, as it has been a constant source of encouragement and inspiration for our marriage:

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud, or rude.
It does not demand its own way.
It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
1 Corinthians 13 : 4-7

It’s easy to hold offense within a marriage, and it’s also very easy (if not comfortable) waiting around wishing that our partner would do all the work because it’s their turn do the work. However, marriage is a partnership, therefore our pride needs to move aside, and love needs to step bravely forward. Because: “Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures through every circumstance.”

The truth is , when you are committed to wanting to do whatever it takes to make your marriage strong, your marriage will thrive no matter the season! It will bear fruit that will last a lifetime that will bless those around you! Why not start today, by taking that first step of love towards your partner. Trust me you won’t regret it!